My dissertation was on mate selection, and before you say, “I get it,” and move on, there is an interesting twist most people do not consider. But first, the ho-hum acknowledgement is that the underpinnings to successful marriages and unions share some strong overlap with the makings of successful leadership. So want to know what isn’t so obvious? It is this: The way you got your needs met as a kid is now playing out as the adult rendition of that earlier behavior.
For example, as a kid in my family-of-origin, I was the peacemaker. The adult version of that hurt my approach to optimizing corporate relationships, because I too often as peacemaker compromised myself in those earlier years. I had a fear of confrontation and conflict.
For more than two decades I’ve watched members of C-Suites as well as executives and managers throughout multiple tiers of organizations play out how they got their way as kids. That woman who gets loud and dominating might well have thrown a temper tantrum as a little girl. That man who retreats to his office or shuts down is also playing out the adult version of how he handled conflict as a kid.
It’s a beautiful thing watching people cultivate a healthy style of inter-relating that culminates in a win-win. It’s even more beautiful for them experiencing themselves as in healthy control of their corporate and personal relationships. It’s in giving up control we get it. Join us at The Leadership Trust® on the journey within to unleash your full human potential. It’s a good ride that can take you places you likely haven’t been.